Sleep Training - The First Night

First let me say that Dr. Ferber is my hero.  His method of "gradual extinction" is highly recommended, and although I knew it would be hard, we decided to try it out.  When following the Ferber method you put your child to bed awake because you are trying to break bad sleep associations.  His theory is that if you were used to being rocked to sleep every night and then you woke up alone in your crib you wouldn't be very happy about it, and you wouldn't be able to go back to sleep without being rocked.  The goal is to teach your child to go to sleep in her crib, so if she wakes up in the middle of the night she will be able to put herself back to sleep.

Of course, most babies who are used to being rocked to sleep aren't very happy about being put into their cribs when they're still awake, so they cry.  The Ferber method allows the partent to go check on/comfort the child at set intervals so the child knows that she's not being abandonned in her crib.  I really think this is more for the parents than the kids since, Harper didn't even seem to notice that I was trying to get her to calm down.

We moved Harper's crib into the spare bedroom so she wouldn't disrupt Tannah's sleep (or bother our neighbors too much).  Their room looks so empty with only one crib!

The first night the intervals were 3 minutes, 5 minutes, and 7 minutes.  I put Harper in her crib and set a time for three minutes.  You're not supposed to pick your baby up when you go in, and you're only supposed to stay for 1-2 minutes maximum.  Harper cried, I cried, Wei-Yand was excited that we were teaching our daughter and doing some "real parenting".  I went in to pat Harper and tell her that mommy loves her, and she just kept crying.  It was heartbreaking.  When I hear one of my babies crying, everything in me screams to go pick her up and make her feel better. I kept telling myself that this was going to benefit all of us because a lack of sleep isn't good for her either.

I went in at the prescribed intervals, and she fell asleep after 36 minutes.  I really thought she was going to hold out for much longer than that, so we were really excited.  Wei-Yand army crawled into the room to make sure that she was ok.  She was, so we high-fived and decided that this might actually work.

She woke up 45 minutes later, I went in to pat her, and she fell back to sleep before my 3 minute timer went off.  Again, we considered this a success.  I went to sleep.

She woke up around 11:15, and that is when the fun (I'm being sarcastic here) began.  We really wanted to try to get her to extend her time between feedings, so we set four hours as the time she needed to go between feedings.  She cried until I fed her at 12.  She cried for a little while after the feeding, but then went to sleep.  She kept waking up on and off, and Wei-Yand went to go lay down in the spare bedroom next to her crib so he could comfort her.  I tried to get some sleep, but it's really hard for me to sleep when I could hear her crying. 

Tannah woke up around 3:15, so I fed both girls.  Again, Harper cried for a while, but eventually fell asleep and slept until I woke her up at 7 am.  The book says not to let your baby sleep past her normal wake up time so she gets used to sleeping at night.  She smiled at me in the morning just like she always does, so I was encouraged that she didn't hate me. 

The book says to use the same system with naps, but if your child doesn't fall asleep within 30 minutes to end the nap.  Lets just say that Harper didn't nap on Monday.  However, she was still in fairly good spirits as long as someone was playing with her.

This is another really long post, so I'll continue the story later.  Don't worry, the training starts going much better on day 2:)

The Sleep Situation

Most of my posts are pretty upbeat because, for the most part, life with Harper and Tannah is pretty fantastic.  Most parents probably feel this way, but I really think we have some of the sweetest babies in the world.  However, since part of the purpose of this blog is to document our lives so I don't forget all of the fun stuff we have going on right now, I would be remiss if I didn't also mention our biggest challenge - sleep, or more accurately, lack thereof.

I'm nursing the girls, so until I went back to work, I got up for every single feeding.  Around two months, the girls were sleeping reasonably well, and only getting up once during an eight hour period.  I'm not exactly sure what happened, but at the beginning of July our sleep situation went downhill.  I think that Harper has gotten up at least three times every night since then, sometimes it's four or five times.  It can also take a few hours to get her to sleep at night. 

After my first week of work, we decided that Wei-Yand was going to have to take over some of the night duty or I wouldn't be able to function at work.  Fortunately, we have lots of frozen milk, so I try to go to sleep as soon after we get the girls down as possible.  Unfortunately, we often eat after they go to bed, so it's often 10 or 10:30 before I go to sleep.  Wei-Yand covers any wakings until about 2 am, then I'm back on duty.  I'm usually up around 2, 4, and 6.

This has led to some seriously tired parents.  Every once in a while one of us gets a six hour stretch of sleep, but most often the most we get is four.  Wei-Yand seems to be dealing with the lack of sleep better than me (perhaps because he often gets naps in during the day while the girls are sleeping).  However, he has definitely relied on some crutches (i.e. the swing and holding the girls) to get them to take longer naps during the day, and he has to go back to work in two weeks.  I worry that napping at daycare is going to be a fiasco.

In short, as much as I hate to do it, it's time for a change.  I don't foresee any issues with Tannah, but it's going to be a struggle to get Harper to fall asleep on her own and stay asleep.  I checked out "How to Solve Your Child's Sleep Problems" from the library, and we are getting ready to begin our sleep training.  I'm not looking forward to it.  I hate having a baby cry when I know that she would stop if I just picked her up.  I keep telling myself that this will make all of us happier in the long run.  Hopefully I'm right.

This post has gotten kind of long, and is kind of a downer, so here are some cute pictures of my beauties.  Hopefully I'll have a post in a few days discussing the miraculous change in our sleep situation.  Fingers crossed!

Grandpa's Little Heartbreakers

I'm from Michigan, so my dad (and grandpa) are big Lions fans.  Wei-Yand is a big fan of the Packers.  My dad is highly concerned that his grandbabies are going to end up cheeseheads (or brewer fans).  One of my good friends gave us a stack of bibs, and there was a Packer bib included, so of course I had to give my dad a hard time. 

Breaking Grandpa's heart



Adventures in Solids

Our pediatrician gave us the information on starting solids at the girls' 4 month appointment.  I've been doing some research, and planned to wait until closer to six months to give their little digestive tracts a little more time to fully develop.  Then Harper started waking up every 2 hours or so all night long.  And she kept waking up that much all night long.  The girls have been staring us down while we eat, so we decided to try some oatmeal to see if that would help keep her little belly full for longer at night.  For the record - it didn't.

Here they are all ready for their first tastes.  Also for the record, Tannah continues to be more interested in eating her bib than in the food I offer her.

We actually took a video of each of the girls' first bites, but this was during the first meal.  Neither had a very big reaction.  They weren't super excited about it, but they both ate a little.  Harper seemed more into it than Tannah.

I'm pretty sure that we ended up with just as much food on the girls as in their bellies, but I called it a success.   



Since neither of the girls was super into it, and it didn't help Harper sleep any better, we decided to put solids on hold for a little longer, and to re-visit in a week or two.  I also bought some sweet potatoes, because I'm going to attempt to make as much of their baby food as possible.  Hopefully, they'll like it a little more the next time we try solids.

Five Months!

The girls are five months old today!  They are just the sweetest little things, and life is definitely getting easier now that they can occupy themselves for brief periods of time.  They still aren't sleeping well, but they're lots of fun while they're awake.

Here's what's going on in Harper and Tannah's world:

• Both girls love their exersaucer and jumperoo, and are usually quite content to play in those for 15-20 minute stretches.
• They generally like the activity mat for short periods of time, but they can be a little destructive with it now that they are getting stronger.  They often kick the arches out of the blanket.  There is a bird that flies and has lights at the meeting of the two arches, and the girls tear that down within about 30 seconds of being on the mat.
• They both grab toys, and everything goes right to their mouths.
• They love to play peek-a-boo with our Aiden & Anais blankets.  They especially love the one with monkeys.
• They are starting to like lovies and any type of cloth they can grab and bring to their faces/mouths.
• They are in 3-6 month clothing.  Our new fall clothes are 6 months, but they're a little big.
• Tannah is in size 3 diapers.  Harper wears size 3 at night and size 2 during the day (only until our size 2 stash is depleted).
• The girls had their first taste of solid food last week.  We tried oatmeal.  Neither seems all that interested, so we're going to wait a few weeks, then we'll try again.
• Tannah is still talking (and squealing) up a storm.  She loves to suck on her middle and ring finger.
• Harper is a little quieter, but she is becoming more and more talkative.  She has taken to sucking on her fist, but still likes her pacifier when she is sleepy.
• Tannah has done a few 7-8 hour stretches of sleep.  She also will often put herself to sleep in her crib if we turn Twilight Violet on.
• Harper likes to see one of us every few hours at night, and has not been sleeping very well.  We are still swaddling her, and she needs to be completely asleep before being put down in her crib (and then she still often wakes back up a few times).

Weekends with Grandma and Grandpa

August was my parents' month to come visit us, and we eagerly awaited their arrival.  The girls haven't been sleeping very well lately, so I was really looking forward to getting a little extra sleep while they were here.  Grandma and Grandpa sure do love their grandbabies, and it's pretty clear that the girls love them as well!

It was pretty much a perfect weekend.  I got in a few naps.  Wei-Yand and I got to go on a date (finally saw Harry Potter!)  We went to the zoo and the farmers' market.  It was wonderful, but we always miss my parents when they leave.

Beach Babies

I've mentioned before that I love Lake Michigan.  I grew up just a few miles from the lake (and still live very close to it although on the not as nice side).  Every summer when I go home I like to spend at least one day at the lake.  This year, I was excited to take the girls.  We bought baby hats, swim suits and diapers, and a big umbrella since the girls are still too young for sunscreen.

The girls were looking awfully cute in their bathing suits.

Unfortunately, that's the last picture of the day because Ia was a bad mom, and I forgot the camera.  Here's how it went down.  We got to the beach and set up.  My mom and I took the girls down to the water to dip their toes.  Tannah started screaming the second her toes hit the water.  Harper was a little more tolerant. 

There's a little channel between Lake Michigan and a smaller lake that little kids like to play in because it's usually a lot warmer than the big lake (which was actually quite comfortable the day we were there).  We tried that as well.  Tannah was still not having any of that, but Harper actually sat down in the water and splashed a little bit.  Tannah didn't calm down until we got her out of the swim diaper.  Then she was happy as a little clam laying under the umbrella on the beach.

Hopefully next summer will be better.